Jim and Sandra Neuwirth
Chabad 17th Anniversary Dinner Speech
For Sandra and me, one of the best parts of being named parents of the year was the reactions of our friends. After the invitations went out, many of our friends mentioned it when they saw us. And they almost always said the same thing. Which, by the way, wasn’t congratulations. It was, “why are you guys parents of the year?”
But I have to admit that I can relate. When the Rabbi called to say that he and his wife Sara wanted to honor us as parents of the year, I was quite taken aback. I know Sandra is a great parent, so that part made sense to me. And yes I’ve been known to whip up some good pancakes on the weekend, but still, “Chabad parents of the year?,” something was not adding up.
Here on the phone was Rabbi Paltiel, the guy who always talks about the virtues and the benefits of wrapping Tefillin each morning, of keeping kosher and going to Shul on Shabbat. And sure, in our home we say the prayer on the wine and bread each Friday night. And, I do occasionally see the Rabbi on Shabbat (pause), waving to him from my car as he’s walking home from synagogue. But the truth is, we don’t follow many of the orthodox guidelines.
Sandra did grow up observing most Jewish holidays and continues to keep kosher. Yet, on Saturdays you’re more likely to find her at Target or Bloomingdales than at Chabad. And as for me, well, let’s just say that many of my favorite restaurants are not ones I’d recommend to the Rabbi. So while Sandra and I were of course delighted to be honored, this event did prompt us to really reflect on our relationship and connection with Chabad.
We moved to Port Washington in August of 2002, when our oldest son Russell was just one years old. The High Holidays were right around the corner and we didn’t know where we would attend services. Sandra suggested Chabad; she’d heard good things about it and it was a fairly short walk from our house. I was frankly a bit nervous. There had been a Chabad around the corner from my office in Manhattan and the only thing I associated with Chabad at the time was men with long beards, long black coats and black hats. (Turning to Rabbi): No offense Rabbi.
But I reluctantly agreed to try it out. And you know what, the services were great. At the time, I don’t think we would have been able to put it into words, but there was just this feeling; it’s a place where right away you felt comfortable.
I grew up going to Reform synagogues and as an adult had the opportunity to attend some Orthodox services with my grandfather. For me, the Chabad services were the best of both worlds. There was an openness and non-judgmental atmosphere that I had experienced at Reform synagogues, combined with a very spiritual and moving service that I had experienced with my grandfather. Both Sandra and I found services at Chabad Port Washington to be educational, uplifting, relaxing, entertaining, fun and in so many ways, just right. So, we were definitely sold on High Holidays at Chabad.
A year later, Sandra suggested that Russell attend the Chabad pre-school. To which my loving reaction was, Chabad pre-school?! Are you kidding me?! High Holidays are one thing, but pre-school, that’s another story! I mean, after a couple of years there is Russell going to come home with Peyot and a Yamaka and tell me not to drive on Shabbat? Now, I know many of you here are observant, so please don’t take offense at what I’m saying. But you have to understand, when you’ve grown up Reform and you don’t view yourself as “religious”`, well this can be scary stuff.
But fortunately, I listened to the part of me that knows Sandra is usually right, and agreed to Chabad pre-school. And as they say, the rest is history. We saw our son receive a great secular education combined with a strong Jewish education program and we’re both so grateful for how well Chabad prepared Russell for public school and for giving him such a strong foundation in Judaism that we know will strengthen him throughout his life. Our second son, Aden, he just finished up the pre-school program and our third son Andrew just started there this month.
Both Russell and Aden now attend the Chabad Hebrew School. And here’s something I find truly amazing; they actually seem to really like it. They look forward to going and have smiles on their faces when we pick them up. I don’t know about you, but I remember my Hebrew School experience just slightly differently. So it’s been holiday services, pre-school, Hebrew school. Also summer camp for our youngest, a Torah study class for me, and lots of fun events we attend as a family throughout the year.
In sum, Chabad has allowed us to become active and involved members of the synagogue at our own pace and in our own way and we have embraced, in our own way, many of the benefits it has to offer. So, to the question of why we were selected as parents of the year? We’re still not quite sure, but we do know that we made a good decision as parents by becoming involved with Chabad. We obviously can’t speak for anyone else, but for us, Chabad has been the right place, and our family and our Port Washington experience have been greatly enhanced by it. So thank you Rabbi Paltiel and Sara and Rabbi Weinberg and Devorah for the honor, and we look forward to many great years ahead as Chabad members.